'They owned a funeral home, but I buried them with pettiness': Funeral homeowners attempt to outmaneuver neighborly opponent in regards to 8 foot tall fence, 5 years of petty revenge ensue

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    Font - Posted by u/jbarlocker 21 hours ago Build me an expensive fence. 2 One night I had a knock at my door from the funeral home owners down the street. They told me that they had just bought the property between us and we going to demolish the house to build a parking lot. They said that they wanted to build a nice vinyl fence between us and that they would pay for everything. All they needed from me was to sign an agreement saying that it was ok for them to build the fence. This agreement wa
  • 02
    Font - I told them that I would be happy to take the agreement and read/sign it tomorrow because it was already 9pm. They told me that they couldn't leave the document with me and that I had to sign it right now. I responded that I don't ever sign legal documents without reading them completely and that i don't have time right now to read them, then suggested that they mail me a copy. After this they got very pushy and told me that i have to sign it and i have to do it right now! At this point I
  • 03
    Font - I did some research and city code required them to build a very specific type of fence because we had two different zonings of property next to each other. A bit later they built a foam-core concrete fence that was 8-feet tall. It looked good, and to an untrained eye looked to meet the requirements of the city ordinance. At this time i also received a letter from their lawyer about the old wooden fence that they also left standing was on their side of the property line and that if i tore
  • 04
    Font - Cue the petty revenge... I found a city ordinance that outlaws a "fence within a fence". It basically says that there is only one fence allowed per property line. I took that to the city planning commission and they forced my neighbor to remove the wooden fence. I refused to allow him or his workers onto my property.
  • 05
    Font - After that was completed I went back to the planning commission to demand that the correct fence be built - city ordinance stipulated an 8-foot tall solid masonry fence and explicitly forbid the use of foam core fencing in this situation. The commission sided with my and made him tear out his brand new fence. After that he put up a temporary chain link (free standing) fence between our properties. The wind kept blowing it down so I asked him to take care of it. He told me to figure it out
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    Font - They were also taking a long time to get the permanent fence in so i ordered a Borat style neon green speedo. (You should google it to really understand.) i then wore that during the nights in the summer while i sat at my fire-pit. The guests of funerals could clearly see all of me lit up in the twilight. I like to think that this helped motivate them to put in an opaque fence.
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    Font - When he finally put in the correct fence his workers trampled about 30 feet of my rose bushes and ki" ed them so I had the planning commission order him to pay me damages for the roses. The workers also broke some of my sprinklers and i was able to force him to repair those too. To top this all off he stained his side of the new fence and left mine with only stain splatters and stain drips. Since i was batting 1000 i went back to the city ordinances and found one the prohibited this exact
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    Font - It took 5 and a half years of petty revenge, but now I have a beautiful tall fence to keep my yard quiet and safe. It added a lot of value to my property too! Hey Mr and Mrs Funeral Home, sign that! Edit 1: i added the borat part that my sister in law reminded me of.
  • 09
    Font - cabird78 +2 - 21 hr. ago They might own a funeral home, but you, my friend, buried them with your pettiness. 1.6k Reply Share Worldly_Basil_6245 +1. 21 hr. ago They ked it 217 Reply Share
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    Product - holodeck_warranty +1 - 21 hr. ago Sure, the neighbors are as oles - but at least their guests are quiet. Reply Share 436 AmbitiousAd560 • 20 hr. ago I'm sorry but I laughed WAY too hard at this!! 74 39 Reply Share
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    Font - RJack151 +3 21 hr. ago Sounds like the funeral home wanted to be cheap while they trampled on your rights. Good for you. 384 . /s TheGibberishGuy - 13 hr. ago OP's the real a ole here, everyone knows funeral homes run on a razor thin margin! 51 Reply Share Reply Share
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    Font - P +120 hr. ago Loved this one, they were like "SIGN THE PAPER NOWWWWW" but then got 5 years of hardships & headaches PainBri315 256 Reply Share jbarlocker OP 19 hr. ago It was so fun to do all the "homework" too! 146 Reply Share
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    Font - Fiempre_sin_tabla +2 · 17 hr. ago I welded his rented fence pieces together. They were no longer portable ...and no longer returnable to the fence-rental place. I love it! Reply Share 57
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    Font - arbor1920 +2- 20 hr. ago Dang! Maybe they'll learn not to irritate people to "sign this!" at 9pm. I'd go ballistic if somebody did that to me. I don't even like people calling me on the phone past 8pm. LOL 133 Reply Share
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    Font - PhoenixFlare1+1 18 hr. ago Since they were pushy about getting you to sign a 3-page contract sight unseen at 9 pm, I'm positive there was something in there that would've scrived you royally. Good for you not signing it. ↑ 123 Reply Share
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    Font - my_effed_up_life. 20 hr. ago You sir, (assuming gender and apologies if im incorrect) are my kinda petty! I love it. Slow and steady, letting them think it's over each step of the way. Reply Share 101 jbarlocker OP. 19 hr. ago Thank you! I thought that everything was well deserved. Reply Share 61
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    Font - Aiku +2 - 20 hr. ago I love this! Sustained, long-term revenge that they brought on themselves. 27 Reply Share
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    Font - anomalous_cowherd +3 - 19 hr. ago I wonder what was in that "agreement"? Seems like the rules were pretty strict about what type of fence had to be there which a neighbourly agreement wouldn't override, so maybe it was just about who had to pay for it? 50 Reply Share
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    Font - jbarlocker OP. 18 hr. ago I'll never know. They wouldnt even let me hold it. They wanted me to sign it while they held it! 50 Reply Share TigerBelmont +3 - 18 hr. ago It probably was an agreement that you pad half 21 Reply Share
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    Font - _gadget_girl +2 - 20 hr. ago So glad they were not able to take advantage of you. 20 Reply Share spacecowboy203 · 16 hr. ago Their tactics likely work in their funeral home business with grieving families which is why they tried the same thing here. Very sad 20 Reply Share
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    Font - _my_choice_ +3 - 19 hr. ago LOL! You should never be an asshole, but if you are going to be, you better make sure you are right and following the law to a T. Reply Share 22 jbarlocker OP. 19 hr. ago Agreed! They didnt think their position through very well. Reply Share 23
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    Font - 100 Tom_Marvolo_Tomato The funeral home is probably used to dealing with folks who don't argue back at them. +1 15 hr. ago - 11 Reply Share
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    Font - supershinythings +2 11 hr. ago The Borat-style speedo is called a "Mankini". And wearing it in full view of active funeral services is GLORIOUS. They will NEVER forget Granny's funeral. 8 Reply Share
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    Font - frisbyterian69 - 16 hr. ago And to think all of this could have been avoided if they hadn't tried to strong-arm you into signing. 47 Reply Share

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